ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
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