she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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