So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
