I'll bet she douches with gravy.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
