If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize