Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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