youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
