Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Barsexuality is the new black.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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