At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
