I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize