she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
he quoted the bible to break up with me
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
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