hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
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