Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
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