am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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