I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
