do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
He keeps bees of course he's weird
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
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