I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
