We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Randomize
