yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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