i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
They have beer where we have blood.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I would ride that face into the sunset
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
