Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
