They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
so let's talk penis.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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