Porn is love you can see.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
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