Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
