So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
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