I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Randomize