We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize