i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
don't judge my taste in strippers
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
Randomize
