Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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