He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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