i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Dicks are not precious.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
