"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
