i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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