The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
