you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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