My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
