shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
