It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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