Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Randomize
