I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
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