I think I died a long time ago.
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.