I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
my being single is dangerous.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
