Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
