I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Randomize