why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
Randomize
