It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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