I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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