ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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