i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
