I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Randomize
