you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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