But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)